Why is it that I’m always looking for change but it never comes? Do I have to be actively seeking it? I always feel stuck in a state of constant boredom and nothingness, expecting something exciting to occur spontaneously. I realized I don’t like stability or at least being the same thing at the same place for too long. (The only exception to this would be my participation in the Catholic Church.) But other then that, I get too bored much too easily. Ironic, considering I do little that’s exciting in my life. A lifetime of keeping to the norm has managed to control my inner self, with all her far-fetched hopes and seemingly impossible dreams, small and tranquil. But I’m honestly through with being bored and doing the same thing over and over. If I really want change, I have to stop expecting that some wild twist in the universe will suddenly change it all for me and bring me the life that so far has only existed in my imagination. If I really want excitement then I must create. After all, I’ve learned that when you really want something in life, you can really only count on yourself to get it.